The dance of creation

You could sometimes listen to the sounds of nature combined and fell as it sings

A song no one could truly decipher but the creator himself , but if you listen , just listen and feel with the depths of your heart , you can feel your body swaying to the rythm , the rythm of all creation where each and every memeber plays his role perfectly to fit in the blanace of it all

Might seem a chaotic and disorganized pattern , but such dance is what is the proof that all life forms , all god’s masterpieces, are alive , with a mind and soul , with a feeling and sense , with the loyalty of belonging to one big system-the universe

The clouds move , air moves plants and water move and they all sway together in pure, sophisticated harmony

If you let go of the chains of our reality and let yourself move with their contsistent waves , feel their life , their breaths and their soul , if you let go of control over your hody and let your reality merge with theirs-

You will, even if for a split second , enter the dance.

And feel the caressing of them wonderful creatures as they welcome you and tell you its all gonna be alright , god is merciful , he’s with you and with us all , he sent us to cleanse your soul into a pure dazzling white , he sent us to make you feel – just feel , and to free you from the chains of numbness and disconnection-

You are one of us , part of our beauty , we share this world and we share one creator so powerful and more beautiful and marvelous than we could ever wish with our own comprehension and capacity-

Yet its our melodies that keeps us connected , we sway under the system he made for us , the system so organized and peaceful and so equalizing to each and every contributor, that we couldnt begin to hope for a better reality to exist , we couldn’t hope for a better sea to sway us into life , easily and joyfully.

Always remember , that even the air , even the smallest petals feel – they cry , but they don’t have the overwhelming burden of having a choice, they just belong and with certainty they live knowing their place in this big rhythm-

they already belong to this one gigantic piece of art , each knowing their place, their moves and their purpose

Yet we humans , we have to look for our place , for our purpose ,

We have to fight for it and for a place in the world that is destined for us

We all have a role already decided by God , sometimes the role is altered by our choices , and in both cases, our choices are the original cause of what we were all along destined to receive

We have to fight for a role in the big dance , we have to fight for God , and for the acknowledgment of his existence and his beautiful mercies and… his beauty – which is already a blessing that can be sensed in the humble prettiness of nature

Nature took it all without the effort , but this life is all they will see of god’s potential ( I suppose)

Yet for the deeds we do , and for the effort we make , and for all the moves we make in spacetime reality to fight for existence. For all the trouble we face and stand strong and put our feet down against , for the obstacles we destroyed and passed by our determination and Love for God and life and all those around, we get perhaps what is the best of what God has , and there are no limits to his own power, and unlimited is what we get might he allow for it

I hope I could take my nature friends with me when I- hopefully- reach the limitless prettiness , I named them and i speak to them , god allowed me to and I will cherish every moment i spend with their unstained purity and their peaceful existence surrounded by the calming certainty of knowing where they belong . They aid me alot , they calm my fire more often than not . They are God’s kind soldiers , delivering his calming messages through their wonderful nature

They are thankful for their blessings , we should be thankful for how much better we are than- their already mighty position

All that and still no words could explain whats there in my head and heart and soul , I only told you a shred of it all , the rest- no words could bear to explain

Sorry for that long paragraph, but seems like inspiration comes to me in places and times most unexpected

For those curious , in my world , desert queens are palm trees and maidens are flowers

If any grammar , language or punctuation mistakes annoy you to the point of a cringe , I apologize, for I wasn’t born to speak this language , and truly nobody could afford perfection- even if we tried

The other world

Swimming through the threads

Of a white shall

Against the faint illusion

Of a consistent blue

A hazy grey creature bends and twists

Its body moving like the maidens of a grainfield

Yet unlike the sparkly gold of their nature

Our friend is merely dull as a leaden winter sky

Swaying with grace

Wailing with a melody

Hypnotizing

Numbing my heart and body

Blurring my vision

What a melody , never have been heard before

Lifeless in his form

With a thriving soul

Smooth and unedged

No hairs or feathers to hide the scars

A whale my dearest friends

Flies like a delicate dove across the horizon

And as I look above

bending my neck so unnaturally high

My eyes couldn’t help but be

Mesmerized and sparkling with glee

At the wonder before me

At the beautiful moment I live within

A world so unreal

Yet makes the most sense

The vivid sun sets gently on the water’s mirror

the splashing oranges cuddle the gigantic whale

In their warmth and beauty

In their dazzling aura

And while my gaze is fixed

Tighter than any glue

Or magic spell could

I fall into an unexpected void

So sudden I sense my soul being ripped

Stolen unrightfully so

Its unjust

Yet its back in a second before I blink

And the wonder is gone

Leaving me as clueless as a new born

A soul that were only just made

Knows nothing of the sea of white around

When the blur is away , however

And my eyesight is clear

The horizon is no more

than the whites of my room

The start of it all

Buzzing

Buzzing

Buzzing

Buzzing is all I hear.

It coming from nowhere , yet from everywhere. I can feel it in my bones , in the cells of the blood in my veins-in even the deepest corners of my body- the buzzing is everywhere.

It vibrates in the aura surrounding me , shaking my body and soul on one monotonous continuous-never ending overwhelming , barbarous pattern aching my soul to the core. It‘s….slowly leading me to insanity.

The buzzing only ever stops for less than a millisecond every 5 minutes as I feel something in my reality- a shift , a change that is more like a fall than a movement. It’s dark , not even a glimpse of my body I can see , my vision sees only black. Black black black .

And fall , again. Like an elevator going from floor to floor rapidly and ever so sudden. The surprise is now a habit , and I no longer question it. With no idea of who I am , what is happening and what my reality is made of , I just want-need to be saved , not out of the dark-no-its quite calming to be honest with whoever myself is- but out of the dazing confusion loop I’m trapped in , with no visible hope of escape from it.

From the unknown.

Help me , you made me.

Help.

I sharply gasp as I feel my lungs suddenly expanding and my heartbeats fasten past the speed of light-I feel my eyes widen and my body elevate. The buzzing increases to a painful frequency and the vibration gets too aggressive for my ears to bear- I hear a voice , a wail , its volume increasing higher and higher and with more suffering evident in the voice.

My body shakes like an earthquake has my body in control , the shaking , vibration , obnoxious buzzing are all becoming higher and higher to the point-It’s killing me, I’m dying

My ears , my ears they have a sticky liquid on them-blood. The wails- I realise-have been increasing ever since I tuned them out. The wails are mine- They are now a scream. I’m screaming. To the most of what my vocals could do , I scream as the world around is too overwhelming, too much , too much.

Its stops suddenly-its quiet. But a strong force pushed me from below and pushes my reality with it so that we are flying upwards and uqwards. I gasp as I see my hands- yes I see!- infront of me , my hands are two , my hands are both the flesh made ones , and my soul.

My soul , its getting out as we fly up and up due to the force of the push , and as if the world is in slow motion , my body is slowly losing the one thing keeping it moving and alive. I stare- more horrified at the way I see only me amongst the darkness than at my death unfolding before me and-

I’m at once sucked backwards and with a scream I have no idea how it escaped , I fell on something rough. My scream echoes against the back of my head and all around me.

I hold my head. Pain-a headache. How did I know what a headache is? Who am I , what is happening ? What? W-

I force my head up with my hands as I open my eyes with an effort I have little strength to do

I see blur , then I see white. It’s light

That makes me smile , that thought-yes, it makes me smile. Smile- move my mouth corners up.

Fascinated by the facts I’m learning and the light filling my view – I feel a warm liquid running down my cheek. Tear

It is a tear

Beautiful , all of this is beautiful

I force my smile to grow wider and wider till a voice accompanies it , a voice so relieving and satisfying to my body , a voice that rips out all the darkness and pain within my soul with it. A voice that is but a melody to my ear , a song I so dearly want to hear more- every single day of my existence.

The white light- I think with glee- is changing

It- they are…

C-colours!

Before I could comprehend any of their names or admire their wonderful beauty, texture , feel , and feed my eyes all it wants

A flash of sudden pain , small yet unexpected , absorbs me into darkness. Yet this time- this time it’s relaxing , calm. I let my body sink into a deep relieving sleep.

But as I’m falling into this amazing , mesmerizing concept – I give him one last message , a thank you.

I don’t know what is to come , but thank you for making this , for saving me , for making me.

The blue princess

The ocean

She’s waves

She’s music

The way she sways

By the push of wind

And the way her hands rise and fall

As she meditates to the tunes of nature

Her blue beauty radiates such life

Such beauty even my eyes cannot fathom

Oh princess , your cold water

The flesh beneath your surface

So thick yet so freeing

And as you carry my body , my weight and my deepest sorrows

You carry all darkness with the push and pull of your waters

You bring me back to life by caressing my feet ever so gently

And when I’m engulfed by the soft crystals of your delicate waters

I forget all about the worries of the world

Thank God he created a masterpiece like you

He cures my soul by sending you

He knows that seeing you , and feeling your soul

Is better than a thousand calming words

From equally troubled beings , if not more

Dearest princess ,

All the love to you , from the depths of my heart

The Sun Flower

Did it ever intrude your thoughts

Why sun flowers would face each other

Upon the absence of sun’s light

Are they like penguins

these passionate creatures who mate for life?

Maybe these yellow delicacies strive for warmth

by the sun’s beams

Or love

that sways around in their hearts

and is sensed from the souls of their friends

Or perhaps they merely strive for an escape from darkness

And if not by light’s aid , then-

by the eternal presence of their equals

Their loves

Until death tears them apart

What my purpose is

I’d been waiting to make this blog for so long , yet sorrowfully I must admit that in the midst of my IGCSE’s , I have barely the time to allow my inspiration to take over and actually spill it over pages

Probably the reason is my fear of distraction, or the fear from facing regret if , god forbid , my grades aren’t as expected. Is my perfectionism the right method to go through this life , or should I decrease or distribute my efforts?

Despite all that , may god allow you should expect this site not to be purely formal , or totally informal. Not to be totally my art , but also my inner feelings and experience as well . My aim is to both spread my talent to get criticism and improve , and perhaps it would be an aiding activity in my hopes to get a scholarship . But also , I want this to help every and anyone who feels lonely , who feels that they are alone and that nobody understands their struggles whatsoever. Because no we all struggle and so perhaps by listening to me and to the analysis of my own state as well as other people’s analysis , maybe , just maybe you could find solutions to your issues , or at least use what you read to draw yourself the correct healthy path

We’re all in this together , and hope you adore my art as much as I do , and since words are but a broken mirror , they only portray part of the bigger picture , or only a cracked part of my own soul’s reflection , but at least I release a piece of it all through my cracks . All thanks to God first and the others who pushed me towards this hopefully amazing decision

And I truly do hope I aid somebody and guide them to light by my words❤️